agentak

Title: A Very Batman Christmas
Rating: PG
Summary: Zatanna just wanted to get him out of the Cave just this once.
I wrote this for a friend in December and am just posting it now. It's stored on my family computer and I don't have access to it most of the time.

“C’mon, Bruce...It’ll be fun.”
“I’m fine, Zatanna.”
“You’re not locking yourself in a dingy cave all night. I’m just asking for an hour. The sun’s just barely set. Besides, you shouldn’t be all alone tonight.”
“I’m not alone. Alfred’s here.”
“No, Alfred’s upstairs. Handing out cookies to carollers. ‘Tis the season, you know.”
“I’m aware.”
“Gotham can be without her protector for an hour.”
“I should be out patrolling-”
“At six pm?”
“Criminals don’t keep a nine to five.”
“Yes, but six on Christmas eve?”
“...”
“Oh, don’t give me that look. I know you too well; the glare’s lost its edge.”
“Zatanna...”
“One hour. We worked hard to set this up.”
“Clark put you up to this, didn’t he.”
“No.”
“...”
“Maybe. But he has a valid point, you should be there. Especially as a founding member.”
“The League was started to better protect the innocent, not as an excuse for overly festive theme parties.”
“You don’t even have to change, you’re already in costume!”
“I thought my costume was ‘missing something’. Doesn’t that go against the theme?”
“...We can forgo the ‘Everyone-Wears-A-Santa-Hat’ rule just this once.”
“This changes everything. Just let me put on a coat.”
“Really?”
“No.”
“Fine. Be that way. Just sit in here and stare at the monitors for the next twelve hours. Yrrem Samtsirhc Iretak.”

Zatanna huffed as she marched up the stone stairs, her heels making a light clacking noise with each step. She reached out her gloved hand to slide the clock to the side, but someone had beaten her to it. Alfred was standing in the archway, plate of sugar cookies in one hand and a glass of milk for Bruce in the other.
“He’s all yours, Alfred.” Zatanna sighed as she closed the clock behind her.
Alfred shrugged and continued down the steps. Perhaps he could persuade Master Bruce to take a break. The butler doubted it, but figured he’d try anyway. Upon turning the corner the manservant nearly dropped the plate. In the Dark Knight’s computer chair sat a large red and green Batman shaped present topped with an oversized golden bow. Alfred suppressed his laughter as Bruce glared at him through the small eye holes Zatanna was kind enough to leave for him.